I looked frumpy in this outfit, but I'm featuring it, anyway, because I think it's funny that I got two dresses of the same brand and style but in different colors and different sizes at two separate rummage sales. I don't pay much attention to current fashions, so I'm guessing this style is outdated. Also, the dress looks much better unbelted, but then I look even more frumpy. (I gave this dress to Millie and then stole it back for a day. It looks better on her, but I haven't roped her into FFP yet.)
On with it!
EXHIBIT A:
Wear this dress on a chilly June morning to drop your children off at VBS because you'll see people you've known since you were a teenager, and a bathrobe just won't cut it.
Dress: rummage sale, about a nickel
Belt: hand-me-down
Land's End I'm-a-Mom-but-I-Still-Want-Skinny-Jeans jeans- rummage sale; about a nickel
Sandals: rummage sale; about a nickel
Total cost of outfit: about 15 cents
Optional accessories:
-Poses you try out to land on one less awkward than normal- free except for the loss of pride
-Arrow earrings: leftover from Christmas gifts I made a few years ago
-TWO BLISTERS ON YOUR CHIN**: free. Just make your children some pizza and then scarf it down so fast that the cheese and sauce flip onto your chin midway to your mouth.
-Olive Oyl bun: two seconds of time
Less-awkward poses? Not really.
-TWO BLISTERS ON YOUR CHIN**: free. Just make your children some pizza and then scarf it down so fast that the cheese and sauce flip onto your chin midway to your mouth.
-Olive Oyl bun: two seconds of time
Less-awkward poses? Not really.
Chin blisters!
** Six weeks later, the blisters are gone, but now I have acne there. ACNE?! What am I? A teenager?!
Incidentally, they make me miss my dad, because of this gem he gave me the winter before the Lord took him home. I don't know whether to laugh or cry reading it now, but I think laughter still wins out.
Wear these clothes to mow the lawn, weedwhack, garden, whatever. To look authentic, continue wearing them for several days in a row.
Old-as-the-hills-they-walk-on clogs: hand-me-down
Capris from the early aughts: rummage sale; about a nickel
Green tee: rummage sale; about a nickel
Cost of outfit: about a dime
Optional accessories:
- railroad-man-city-folk hat: rummage sale; about a nickel (my dad liked this hat but would simultaneously make fun of me for wearing it because my parent's lady neighbor wore one like it, and she was "city folk.")
-Two children who want me to fill up their water guns and water balloons from the outdoor spout behind me: priceless
-Grass stains everywhere: free
-Funny face: time spent practicing my moves when I was younger
THE MERCIFUL END.
oh wow.
ReplyDeleteMy children are all the time referring to kids as 'city kids' or 'country kids'... I thought this was because Matt and kin talk this way but now I see it must be a bonafide country person sort of thing.
In fact, they (Matt AND children) all the time remind me that I am a 'city' person though I think I have proven myself over and over again to have country blood running through me. After all, I didn't see THEM milking the cow when it was needed- or making cheese and *I* am not the one complaining when it is time to weed (or plant) the garden.
Actually, I like to remind Matt that I was actually born in a rural Indiana hospital and he was born a New Yorker (at Wilson.) That definitely makes me more country.
ReplyDeleteIn that green shirt & snappy hat, you look an awful lot like your daughter Annie!
ReplyDeleteRebecca,
ReplyDeleteIf I never have before, remind me to tell you about the suppertime game we used to play when we were children. It wasn't until adulthood that I realized how weird it was, and we were, in its reflection of our outlook.
Heidi,
I'll take it! What a compliment!