"With You, It's Always Feast or Famine," She Says.

ANECDOTES. HUMOR ME.
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As a stay-at-homer, I'm privy to all of their circular conversations...

Millie, speaking with the bartering tones of a gypsy: Annie, if you give me twenty-one packs of bubblegum, I'll give you a piece of gold.

Annika: Um. Otay. 'Ere is dum bubbledum. (Extends a fist clenching 21 packs of invisible gum.)

Millie: No, Annika, I mean real gum when you can grow up and buy some. Then I'll give you a piece of gold.

Annika: Oh! 'Ere is da bubbledum onna floor! (Points to 21 packs of invisible gum stacked on the rug.)

Suffice it to say, Millie didn't make the trade.
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Annie: Winter iz 'ere. Winter will be tummin' soon.

Millie: Yes, child, in several more years.
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Backdrop: I helped Annika into heart jammies that Mildred has outgrown.

Millie: I want my heart jammies.
Me: They are too small for you now.
Millie: Yeeeeah, because I am sooooooo FAT! (Declared with much emphasis in grinning pride.) My feet are even bigger than Tandida's!
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While in the bedroom, I hear Annika slip and clunk in the tub. (She was supposed to be using the bathroom.)

Annie, comes whimpering to me: I fell inna bathtub.
Me: What were you doing in the bathtub?
Annie: Um. Fallin' inna bathtub...
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While at my mom's, Debbie was doing math homework while Millie sat beside her. Debbie was reading the problems out loud.

Millie: Firty feet? Whoah! Firty feet is a lot of feet! If an octopus had firty feet he would be taller than a tree.

Hopefully Debbie didn't write that answer down on her paper. (That would be cheating.)
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Overheard a few days ago...

Millie: No, our mother is dead. We can make blueberry lime sandwiches now because our mother is dead. (Then explaining to attentive Annika.) Our mother said we were big enough to make them.........(a thinking pause).........
back when she was almost dead.

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And, lastly, the latest surefire way to know that the Nixie is engaging in a filthy habit. Out of the blue, sometimes even coming in from another room, she will seriously announce to me, "Me not pickin' my nose, Mama. Me not pickin' my nose."

If only we were all so unknowingly forthright about our vices.