*But it does have a lingering kick at the end...
For any newcomers around these parts, here's the explanation for a recurring indulgence in vanity.
It's been a blue moon or two since the last installment of Frugal Fancy-pants. I've intended to take pictures before now, but whenever I was fancy enough, I just didn't care enough. The stars must align, and all that. What's funny is that I haven't felt fancy in a while, and today's featured fancy-pants outfit is rather dull. Forgive me.
Without further ado, here's
EXHIBIT A
Wear this outfit when dour November lets a smile break through, and the weather warms enough to plant fall garlic.
-New York and Company sweatshirt: rummage sale purchase; less than a nickel
-Jeans: rummage sale; less than a nickel
-Red boots: borrowed from your eldest daughter because yours gave up the ghost; under a dollar from a yard sale
Total cost of outfit: Less than a dollar.
Optional accessories:
-Wheelbarrow: came with the house; free (if you don't count the thousands in house loan)
-Feed sack full o' horse manure; free except for some elbow grease
-Bowl full o' 200+ cloves of garlic: free from this summer's harvest
-Sturdy shovel: hand-me-down from the Purdy's; free
-Mini shovel: hand-me-down from Andy; free
-One small elephant: priceless; and under that costume, I'm sure he's also free (as a bird)
Highly recommended accessory:
-One small child in pajamas, playing in aged manure: priceless
EXHIBIT A, PROLONGED
Later that evening, I couldn't resist the opportunity to use Mt. Manure in this post.
Manure-mucking outfit:
-same as the garlic-planting one, only with the addition of dusk.
Optional accessories:
-Old snow shovel: hand-me-down; free (but not really optional when you need a flat, sharp shovel to separate sheets of manure)
-Little boy about to lose our best flashlight: priceless (and the flashlight was a Christmas gift)
Aaaaaand
EXHIBIT B
Wear this outfit to church when you can't find anything else to wear and you're sick to death of wearing all that brown and black hanging in the closet. You won't feel fancy, and you will feel boring, but, hey, you're wearing a color! And it's frugal!
-Heeled boots: re-handed hand-me-down from a lady on Mike Jones' postal route, from her to him, from him to Mary, from Mary to me; free
-Brown polyester knit skirt: a relic from freshman year of college; under a nickel at a rummage bag sale
-Green tee: rummage bag sale; under a nickel
-Jacket: rummage bag sale; under a nickel
-Belt: rummage bag sale; under a nickel
Total cost of outfit: Under a quarter
Optional accessories:
-A fancy, little boy making Indian calls: free
-Twenty pounds of chub gained since summer's end: nearly free
-One and one half ounces of beautiful womb-baby, growing strong: gift from God; free
I normally announce pregnancies as soon as we find out, because I believe all babies deserve to be
celebrated and marked, but I just never did. I don't really know why.
So here you are. Happy belly! Happy baby! Happy day!